Fight for It: Don’t Cry About Losing Something You Didn’t Fight For

It happens time and time again... we lose something...or someone...and we’re absolutely distraught about it. We can’t believe it and don’t understand why we lost it. But we must step back and think...did we FIGHT for it?

Probably not. So why are we upset about it? The reaction is 1 part human nature, 2 parts selfishness and 3 dashes of taking things and people for granted... while being oblivious of doing so. It’s just the truth.

For the someone:  It’s the reason exes will forever send you the “how have you been” or “hey” text months or even years after the relationship has ended. It’s human nature to have the urge to contact an ex, sheer selfishness to actually send the text or make the call, and all of it is an act of taking someone for granted. They didn’t appreciate you while they were with you, but now they’ve gotten the urge to drop back into your life-and trust, they expect to be accepted.

Think about it. If an ex sends that text...and you reply...they’ll continue to go back and forth with you until their need for attention has been satisfied...and then they’ll disappear again. On the other hand, if you ignore or reject them...they will get angry and probably call you all types of names. They didn’t fight to have you when you were with them...but now that you’re gone, they want your attention-on their terms. Newsflash: it doesn’t work like that. Don’t be the ex on the sending OR receiving (and replying to) end of any of those texts.

For the something: These are things that you have or could pursue. The job you have and actually like, your education, your dreams, your goals, so on and so forth. If you hold a position that you enjoy, and you get chosen to make a presentation to get a promotion...fight for it. Agree to do that presentation with enthusiasm and without fear. Know that you can do it and make it the best presentation you have ever made. If you started college straight out of high school but then fell off...don’t get caught up in how long you’ve been out of school. Fight for your education and do what you have to do to go back and finish. If college isn’t for you, read. Read books, read magazines, read articles. Whatever you can get your hands on. You’re still intelligent even if you don’t have a degree or aren’t interested in pursuing one, but you have the power to build on that intelligence and make your brain better than it is today. Expand those horizons. Read something.

And all of those goals and dreams you’ve had for years but always thought they’d never realize...fight for them. Do the work to make them come to life. In all reality, nothing is impossible and you will never know if something works until you TRY. Clean up your social media. Unfollow the foolishness and add some people who are actively reaching for and accomplishing their goals. A few of my personal favorites are Myliek Teele and Regina Anaejionu. These girls knew what they wanted and went for it. They FOUGHT for it through wins and losses and are actively making it all happen. They’re living proof that whatever keeps you up at night is a passion that must be pursued...and it’s ALL possible.  

So the next time something feels like it slips through your fingers or is about to...don't cry about it. Ask yourself ... Did I fight for it? ...if the answer is no, then you have some work to do.
Get to it.

Until next time lovers, dreamers and wanderers alike...

Peace, love and ambition to all.