Retro Post: My own personal March Madness

As nice Tuesday Treat…and to provide something to give you a mini break at the office or wherever you’re at…I just wanted to drop some lines…and of course my March Madness foolishness.

So let me tell you guys about the shit that happened with my car. I was told a few months ago that I needed a water pump replacement. In the meantime, the mechanic I took the car to (per my old boss’ suggestion), put ‘pellets’ in it that coagulated….so it wouldn’t leak. This leak mind you, is only apparent when the car is in MOTION. Therefore…you’re just shit out of luck if you think you’re going to look under the car and find this leak. Price quoted for the job?? Ohhhh….just around $600-$700. Because naturally, the water pump on an Audi is in the middle of the damn engine/next to it. So basically the whole front of the car needs to be taken apart for you to get to it. It’s just very labor intensive shit to replace a part that costs $60 at Autozone …$154 direct from the dealership. Ok, whatever. Time goes by…I’m not even at that office anymore…I’ve moved on to a new office, things are good things are chill. I’m merrily headed down Spring Street one day on my way to the gym and the car goes berserk. BERSERK. It overheats, steam starts coming out of the hood…it looks like the damn thing is on fire under there. People are honking because you know…I don’t SEE THE SMOKE COMING FROM THE HOOD. So I turn right and roll into the parking lot for the Center for Puppetry Arts, because as you know…it wouldn’t be my life if I didn’t end up stranded in THE most random of places. So whatever. I call a ride and I call Progressive-because even with my ‘choose your rate’ plan these other companies try to diss, I was knowledgeable enough to CHOOSE roadside assistance for that extra 3 or 4 dollars. So it was time to use that sucker. First 15 miles hassle. Thankfully I live and work out in town near pretty much everything, so the nearest Pep Boys on Piedmont was the move. FAIL FAIL FAIL . Got the car towed to Pep Boys, they looked at it and looked at it….held it for about 2 days. Finally called me to tell me the thermostat housing and connector hose needed to be replaced. The total for that job???????? Ohhhh….a smooth $888. So I’m like….seriously?????The dude tells me the parts are really expensive. I’m calling bullshit in my head. Sooooo….I did the one thing places like Pep Boys don’t count on. I called the parts department at Audi of Atlanta directly for pricing. The parts came up to a total of ohhh around $150. Expensive, right?? F*ck out of here with all that $900 noise from Pep Boys…not to mention the quote for AUDI service to install the parts was $550… looking at a total of $700.  So wait, aside from not being certain about the issue because they aren’t THAT familiar with German cars, they were charging more for labor than CERTIFIED Audi techs. Oh. Ok. . I politely declined their services and found a different mechanic. It’s a good thing I did too because as soon as that was fixed, the leak from the water pump showed its ugly face. So now the water pump and timing belt need to be replaced in addition to that thermostat housing. They’re getting replaced and let me just say I can’t wait to get back behind the wheel of my car with no problems. Road trip anyone??
Here’s a trip for that ass….so I went to this place called Vittles in Smyrna for a nice brunch. When I walked in, it felt like everyone dropped their forks…like…I’m pretty sure I looked like I didn’t belong. I mean aside from the fact that I was looking around like I was in a dinosaur museum. There was shit EVERYWHERE in this place. They seem to have thought it would be a grand idea to do a mash up of a restaurant and a gift shop. Bad idea. Bad, bad idea. It looked sooooo cluttered you could barely focus on any one thing. There were 5 or 6 of each item and they were on shelves, directly on the wall, on tables, on hooks in book cases….wherever they could fit something, there it went. So I’m like…ok. Whatever. Maybe the food is really good because after all this is a country style place. I get a skillet, it looks pretty good- eggs, potatoes, cheese, turkey sausage…and a full on bowl of gravy to pour onto it. I dipped one potato in the gravy and that was about it for that. So I’m eating my skillet la- di-dah….and out of nowhere…A ROACH FALLS ONTO MY TABLE FROM THE CEILING. I quickly brushed it off of the table and asked my friend , DID YOU SEE THAT??? They didn’t, but I told them to look on the floor and there it was crawling on the floor. It got stepped on, and our server was notified. She turned beet red and said “I’ll take care of it”. Ten minutes later we saw her taking another table’s order. So we tell the bus boy that there’s a freaking roach on the floor that was on our table. He picks it up (with a napkin) and apologizes, saying he will let the manager know. Who never shows up. Mind you, the bill is still on our table. So we go to the checkout register, and the manager is manning it. She says, “how was everything today?” and we had to break it to her that despite the terrible service and lack of concern over a ROACH, no…everything was all of terrible. We told her about it and she said “ok, I’LL DISCOUNT YOUR BILL” We looked at each other like…she must mean the whole thing. All $8 of it. But no. She literally meant a discount- of 15%. So…we let her know that we would not be paying for the meal since there was ….a freaking roach on our table. And let her know she is pretty much lucky we didn’t let the whole establishment in on the nastiness we witnessed. But here it is…for everyone to read…DO NOT EAT AT VITTLES ON SOUTH COBB DRIVE IN SMYRNA. THEY HAVE ROACHES AND DON’T GIVE A SHIT!!!!
Yea, so that pretty much wraps up the foolishness of my version of March Madness. Lessons learned in the month of March? First, don’t eat at restaurants that double as “gift shops” because if they look sketchy enough, it’s probably a bad idea. They took the idea of Cracker Barrel and just royally effed it all up. Second, don’t trust Pep Boys with a German car. If they can’t explain the damn problem to you thoroughly and seem the least bit confused or uncertain, chances are they DON’T know what they are talking about. Find other options.
All that being said…We are now in April and I predict it to be pretty damn great. The week ahead is looking briiighhhhtttttt bitches!
Have a good one and make sure you LIVE WELL, LOVE MUCH, LAUGH OFTEN at all times fools!
Until next time stalkers and amigos…
Peace,  smiles and road trips.